Oh, I wish I wasn’t so thick. You see, I’d really love to be able to understand all the clever maths that economists, politicians, business gurus, city traders and the like are always spouting on TV, but I’m just not bright enough to get it at all and it really depresses me, because I can’t see a way out of the horrible mess we’ve gotten ourselves into like they can.
I was watching TV today, for example, and that strange little bloke who lodges with the PM – wassisname, Clegg or somesuch (?) – was on talking about ‘austerity measures’ and the ‘triple-dip recession’, and I’m so dim I hadn’t got a fricking clue what he was talking about. Now to be fair, I’ve got to say I do find him hard to listen to at the best of times, because he’s such an, erm, how can I put this nicely, erm, uncharismatic sort of bod (he reminds me a bit of that PM we had after Thatcher – you know, the one who tupped Edwina Currie and ate lots of peas and gave us the ‘Not Very Qualified’ qualifications – but even more ineffectual, if that’s humanly possible) but even when I concentrate really, really hard everything that comes out of his mouth just sounds like gobbledygook.
Like today he was explaining how taking money from the poorest and weakest and most deprived in our country and simultaneously giving extra tax breaks to the richest was going to make the country a better place for everyone, and for the life of me I couldn’t get my big, fat dullard brain around it. I mean, I could see what was in it for the people getting the tax breaks, but it just seemed like a double negative for everyone else involved, which obviously can’t really be the case otherwise we wouldn’t have all these incredibly clever people telling us that’s the way to go, would we? Continue reading “An Idiots Guide to Global Economics”